It was always inevitable.
As sure as night follows day and "Where's my money?" follows me entering a pub, there was always going to be a Man Power podcast round these parts. I've put it off, hoping his bubble would burst and he'd be forced to move back to Newcastle and get a job as an apprentice horse nobbler or some shit so I could mock him mercilessly for having the temerity to have a glimmer of ambition (fingers crossed there's time left!). But alas no. It all seems to be going swimmingly for young (sic) master Kirkwood aka Man Power, who now finds himself in the employ of one of Mexico's minor cartels and lives in a compound working as some sweaty drug lords personal 'beat maker' and chiropodist or sutin' like that.
Clearly anyone who knows me, or indeed Geoff, will be aware that I'm not about to spend ANY length of time blowing smoke up his arse or saying anything even remotely positive about his rapid rise to fame and fortune. Oh no. Rather I thought I'd give you all a window into the fractured psyche of the man behind Man Power. An idea of the processes which allow him to seemingly effortlessly churn out mediocre record after disappointing record with alarming pace and regularity. I thought I'd spill some of his deepest darkest secrets. The real nitty gritty. The shit that will make you hurl like a rookie medic attending an explosion at a chainsaw factory. So here goes! When he was only 15 years old he sold his whole family intHEY YOU UK GAY LORD GUYS! STAR WARS ISNT FOR KIDS. U BEEN HACKED BY DARTHVAPER69. IF U WANT UR PRESS RELEASE BACK U MAKE A MORK AND MINDY MOVIE ABOUT CRAIGS DAVID WHO DID 9/11 FALSE FLAG. DO IT OR I HACK UR VAPE PEN TO MAKE UR VAPES TASTE LIKE PUBES. ALSO PLZ FOLLOW ME ON TWITCH (NAME: minion4adick) FOR SONIC THE HEDGEHOG SPEED RUNS AND AWESOMES TITTIES PICS THANK YOU BYEut all of that however may just have been a McGuffin. Non of this tells us why he always smells of liver, why he can't walk sideways and why he always has a yarking, greet big carb face on Thursdays?! No. It in fact tell us nothing, but he knows that he'll never be able to wash the blood of those children off his hands!!
Anyway, now that that's out of the way, here's the mix that the murdering bastard sent us so you might as well dig in. You've clearly got nowt better to do!
Man Power on Facebook.
Man Power on Soundcloud.
Man Power's vacuous exercise in online vanity.
As always, you can download the podcast over at out Hearthis.at page below. X
Till next time.
Big love Mark. X
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